We like to think we’re in control.

That we choose our careers. Our paths. Our limits.

But most of the time? We’re not choosing.

• We’re complying… with a quiet, persistent narrator in our head that was shaped years ago.

• By expectations. By fear. By society’s well-meaning but limiting scripts.

That voice becomes the “master.”
And without even realizing it, we start minding it… obeying it… building entire careers around it.

It sounds like:

• “Be realistic.”

• “Don’t risk what you’ve built.”

• “You should be grateful.”

• “This is just how work is.”

And so we stay.

In roles that don’t stretch us.
In environments that don’t see us.
In identities that no longer fit who we’re becoming.

Not because we lack ambition… but because we’ve unknowingly handed over authority.

Here’s the shift most people never make:

Your life doesn’t change when your circumstances change.
It changes when your internal authority does.

Masterminding isn’t about forcing discipline or grinding harder. It’s about awareness. Interruption. Rewriting the script.

It’s about asking:

• Whose voice is this?

• Is it serving the future I actually want?

• What would I choose if I wasn’t operating from fear?

• What core values must I follow that guides every new step I make into the future?

Because the moment you question the voice… you loosen its grip.

And from there, something powerful opens up: clarity.

Clarity isn’t fluffy. It’s strategic. It makes you your OWN BOSS.
It’s the difference between drifting and directing. Following and Leading.

When you get clear, you stop over-compromising.
You stop negotiating against yourself.
You start making decisions that align with who you are now… not who you were when you first said yes.

🌸 This is where coaching becomes transformational.

Not because someone tells you what to do…
…but because they help you see what’s been running you.

They challenge the narrative.
They expand your perspective.
They hold you accountable to the version of you that already knows there’s more.

It’s like therapy for your career… but with a forward gear.

You don’t need more time.
You need alignment.

You don’t need to have it all figured out.
You need to start asking better questions.

And you don’t need permission…
just the courage to stop outsourcing your decisions to an outdated internal script.

So if you feel that quiet pull… that sense that you’re meant for more than what your current reality reflects…

Pay attention.

That’s not restlessness.
That’s awareness knocking.

And awareness, when acted on, becomes transformation.

There’s only one way to master the mind, and that’s to mind your master.

If we spend 36% of our waking life at work, why do so many people quietly tolerate careers that drain them? Some of the most brilliant, capable professionals I meet feel… stuck.

Here’s why:

🚨 Fear of change — “What if the next move is worse?”
🚨 Sunk cost — “I’ve already invested years here.”
🚨 Financial pressure — “I can’t afford a wrong move.”
🚨 Identity attachment — “Who am I without this title?”
🚨 Normalization of misery — “Isn’t everyone a little unhappy at work?”

These thoughts are human.
But they can also quietly keep you parked in a life that’s smaller than your potential.

But,….
Clarity changes everything.

Working with a coach is a bit like therapy for your career.

You get the space to:
💡 Get radically clear on what you actually want
🎯 Map the strategy to get there
🚀 Build the confidence to make bold moves
🌟 Stay accountable while you level up

You don’t have to navigate your next chapter alone.

If you’re feeling the nudge that there’s more for you — there probably is.

👉 Book a Career Accelerator & Leadership Clarity Call with me

👉 or join the NEW Sunday Hummm: Power Hour every Sunday morning with me. (theCrea8ve Subscribers see the coupon code at the bottom for discount)

Let’s unlock your next move.

xo,

Gilli

🌸 theCrea8ve paid subscribers can attend Sunday Hummm half off, just $10. Use coupon code CR8.

“Who are you Really going to be in 2026?”

A week ago, at CREA8E Who You’re Going To Be in 2026 Event, we didn’t just talk about growth. We practiced it. Across two days, we explored identity before action, clarity before speed, and leadership rooted in self-trust. We unpacked what it takes to lead through ambiguity, release old belief systems, reconnect to vision, reframe our relationship with money and worth, and build a brand and roadmap that actually reflects who we are becoming.

One of the most powerful themes that emerged was this: clarity creates momentum.

When you write your goals down, you move them from thought to intention. From wish to commitment.

👉🏻 And when you consciously build your personal brand, not as performance, but as alignment, you create coherence between who you are, what you stand for, and how you show up in the world.

⭐️ Your brand becomes a signal. It attracts the right opportunities, people, and paths, and just as importantly, helps you say no to what no longer fits. In a noisy world, clarity is a competitive advantage.

We’re deeply grateful to our incredible speakers and facilitators for bringing wisdom, honesty, and heart into the room for the CREA8E Event. So here’s a shoutout:

Teena Piccione — for lighting fires under vision and leadership
• Damon D'Amore — for anchored insight into ambiguity and resilience
• (Rev.) Deborah Bishop — for unearthing deeper wealth stories and worth
• Esther Deutsch, MSW — for championing community, connection, and courageous paths
• Jennifer Julian — for elevating voice, creativity, and narrative power
• Jeff Walker, M.A. — for guiding us into vision with clarity and compassion
• Edward Thomas - for bringing entrepreneurship cred to the room
• Robin Boytos - for encouraging us to be bold and brave to step up to the leadership role, when those dare not
• Cindy Alter - for your brave heroine artist entrepreneurship stories

And I was guiding us through the weekend transformation and helping us to dream big, flick off that inner critique and stare 'imposter' in the face

And thank you to every participant who showed up willing to reflect, share, and stretch.

Here’s the invitation we’re all taking forward:

• ✨ Write it down

• ✨ Name who you are becoming

• ✨ Take one aligned step, then another

• ✨ Stop waiting for permission to evolve

Your “next” doesn’t arrive quietly. It responds to intention, courage, and action.

Here’s to stepping boldly into it. 🚀

xo,

Gilli

P.S. Get some action with me one-on-one here

Long before I ever held a leadership title, I was standing on a mountain top in Australia, staring out at a horizon that felt impossibly far away and strangely familiar at the same time.

I didn’t have a plan.
I didn’t have a safety net.
I didn’t even have language for what I wanted.

What I had was a feeling. A knowing. A quiet, persistent voice that said, there is more for you than this.

That voice would become the most important leader I ever followed.

Before Leadership, There Is Identity

We’re taught to measure success by outcomes. Titles. Money. External validation. But leadership doesn’t begin when someone hands you responsibility. It begins the moment you decide to take responsibility for who you are becoming.

The truth is, I didn’t set out to be a “leader.” I set out to be honest with myself.

I followed curiosity before credentials. I followed creative pull before conventional wisdom. And I followed my values long before I ever articulated what they were.

That decision changed everything.

From the Mountain Top to Hollywood

Leaving Australia for Hollywood wasn’t a strategic career move. It was an act of faith. I was young, naïve, and wildly committed to the idea that life could be more than predictable.

Hollywood wasn’t glamorous. It was humbling.

There were closed doors, empty rooms, and long stretches of wondering if I had misunderstood my own calling. But I learned something essential in those years: rejection doesn’t mean you’re on the wrong path. Often, it means you’re early.

Dreams don’t arrive fully formed. They arrive as fragments. You build them as you go.

🎶 Music Taught Me How to Lead Before Business Ever Did

Music wasn’t just an art form for me. It was an education.

I wrote, recorded, and released eight albums. I toured in a van. I slept on floors. I performed night after night, learning how to read a room, hold an audience, and tell a story that made people feel less alone.

I worked with world-class musicians and artists who showed me what discipline, humility, and mastery actually look like. Creativity, I learned, isn’t chaos. It’s commitment.

What I didn’t realize at the time was that I was learning leadership in its purest form:
• Showing up when no one is watching
• Taking responsibility for your craft
• Holding space for others
• Building trust without authority

Those lessons would follow me everywhere.

🫟 The Pivot That Looked Like a Risk and Felt Like Home

When I transitioned from music into technology and corporate leadership, many people were confused. Some were skeptical. A few were openly dismissive.

But here’s what they couldn’t see: I wasn’t abandoning my identity. I was expanding it.

The same instincts that guided me on stage guided me in boardrooms. Pattern recognition. Emotional intelligence. Storytelling. Vision. The ability to connect dots and people.

I went on to lead complex programs at Fortune 500 companies. I worked alongside extraordinary leaders, innovators, and entrepreneurs. And once again, I learned that the best leaders aren’t the loudest in the room. They’re the most aligned.

💫 Alignment Is the Real Power

Every major shift in my life came down to one thing: alignment.

When your inner world and outer actions are in sync, momentum follows. When they aren’t, no amount of success feels satisfying.

Leadership rooted in alignment looks different. It’s less about control and more about clarity. Less about proving and more about building. Less about image and more about impact.

And alignment begins with intention.

✍️ Write It Down. Name It. Build Toward It.

One of the most powerful things you can do is write down who you want to be before the world tells you who you should become.

Not your job title.
Not your income goal.
Your identity.

What values will guide you?
What kind of leader do you want to be when things get hard?
What story are you ready to outgrow?

From there, you create a plan. Then a body of work. Then a brand that signals truth rather than trend.

Your brand is not a logo. It’s your reputation in motion.

⭐️ You Are Allowed to Become More Than One Thing

The biggest myth about leadership is that it requires consistency of role. What it actually requires is consistency of self.

You are allowed to evolve.
You are allowed to pivot.
You are allowed to dream bigger than other people can imagine for you.

If I can go from a mountain top to Hollywood, from touring vans to boardrooms, from artist to executive to entrepreneur, so can you.

Not by copying my path.
But by trusting your own.

Leadership begins the moment you choose who you’re going to be and commit to becoming them, one aligned step at a time.

That choice changes everything. ✨

xo,

Gilli

(my imperfect bio)

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Career paths are rarely straight lines.

They’re mosaics. Curves, pauses, pivots, wrong turns that later reveal their purpose. It’s like Ed De Bono’s Zig Zag Theory. You start in one place thinking y…

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Gosh, promoting an event is a hustle. Lol. But this one’s a goodie. I hope you take advantage of this because my early bird price is ending tonight midnight. I honestly love love helping others grow.…

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Alert: I’m cooking up something exciting for the new year, and i want you to be part of it.

But first, watch this 3 mins vid above. It’s my mantra and can be your mantra for making sure that no matter what is going on around us out there in the job market, the industry or even the country: you are actually in control of who you want to be, what you want to do, and how you want to go about it.

The current market chaos makes it tempting to settle for a safe job, but the cost of compromising your authentic self is professional heartbreak. Your ‘True North’ of your non-negotiable career destination, is worth fighting for, so anchor down and refuse to play small.

Do the Work

If you are in an ‘in the meantime’ situation, use this period, whether you are working in a bridge role or actively searching, to build your personal dream board. I’m not talking about pinning up pictures on the wall (though that’s fun too). I’m talking about taking time to visualize what you really, truly want out of your life, career.

The market will eventually stabilize, but the person who emerges victorious will be the one who refused to settle. Stay focused on your True North Star, use the “in-between” as a powerful launchpad, and never compromise the creative leader and entrepreneur you are meant to be.

Don’t settle. Your future self is waiting for you to make the bold choice.

I’d love your thoughts! Comment below.

Now, drum roll…. I’ve got a very special virtual event cooking

and it’s coming your way right as we spring into the New Year: Saturday 24th and Sunday 25th January to be exact.

How does this feel for you?

• Like a reset?

• Like a breath you didn’t know you were holding?

• Like the version of you in 2026 is suddenly leaning in saying, “Let’s go.”

Good. Because that’s exactly the energy we’re stepping into.

I’m thrilled to share that I’m hosting a brand new 2-day VIRTUAL immersive virtual experience designed to help you get clear, get aligned, and get ready for your next chapter.

It’s called CREA8E Who You’re Going To Be in 2026, and it’s built for leaders, creators, innovators, and anyone who feels that quiet (or not-so-quiet) pull toward something more.

Plus we will have a really impressive lineup of speakers and workshop facilitators. I’m pretty excited.

Together, we’ll reset, reimagine, and rebuild your next chapter.
You’re the first to hear about it because you’re part of my community, and I want you to have early access to everything as it unfolds.

This is your early-bird moment. Only the few who are right, can get ‘in’. No pressure, no commitment — just raise your hand and say, “I’m interested,” and you’ll get first access to details, early bird pricing, and bonuses as we get closer.

Yes Show Me the Info

xo,

Gilli

1. But I also have another blog for agile leadership…

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What you do in life and work won’t be remembered as “things”, “launches” and “projects”. It’s the memory you leave and the people you inspire

I’ve been watching re-runs of ‘COBRA KAI’. My twins, who are 12, recently watched the first 3 Karate Kid movies with me, and then we moved on to Cobra Kai. All we watched were 30 minute episodes of how to conquer BULLIES.

And it hit home. Because I carry the scar tissue from battles of truly sucky bully managers and so-called mentors.

They crushed my spirit. They left me with a shadow I carry into new roles, even when I’m a badass boss (the shadow lurks,… telling me, “you’re not good enough, Gilli”).

Felt that? Yeah, I bet.

Well f*k you, bully.

That lingering Shadow I carry…, the anxiety that whispers in my ear, “Don’t trust it,” even when the new boss is smiling, is the baggage I haul into every new role. It’s the constant, exhausting hyper-awareness, waiting for the moment the other shoe drops and the “Champion turns Bully Snake”. That’s because when you’ve been burned, it leaves an indelible ink…. more like a stain.

That feeling, that gut-punch of professional PTSD, is the price we pay for working under the Underminers of the world. It’s this PTSD “Shadow” I carry into every new role, even when I’m the leader of my group. But here’s the deal: as entrepreneurs, creatives, and leaders, we have to recognize that scar tissue, not just to heal it, but to Master the Shadow and learn from it. We have to conquer it, and create our own “Miyagi-Do” in our psyche.

Let me explain what Underminers and Champions are and how you can overcome and master your shadow to become a truly creative passion leader in life and career.

📍 But first, helloooo friend. Thank you for participating in theCrea8ve. As my platform dedicated to inspiring and coaching entrepreneurs, creatives, and professionals to blend artistry with entrepreneurship and turn passion into purpose, here at theCrea8ve we’re constantly talking about transformation, and for this one, transformation of the self - Dojo-style. This post is particularly directed towards the entrepreneur in all of us, but especially leaders and leaders-in-waiting —the one who’s had sucky guides and managers (what we call Underminers) and amazing role models who gave us wind in our sails (called Champions). Read on!

👇 But second, check your subscription below if you want to hone in on a particular newsletter by theCrea8ve. I want to make sure you’re getting the right one, based on your tastes here.

• Do you crave unbounded business success? Dive deeper with theCrea8ve Leader newsletter for Biz Leaders & Entrepreneurs sub-newsletter. Get insights, strategies, and inspiration specifically tailored to fuel your entrepreneurial journey and leadership growth.

• Are you an artist or musician? theCrea8ve Artist newsletter is your creative haven! Find music industry insights, inspiration, and tips designed to help you thrive in the world of arts, music, theater and songwriting.

• UPDATE YOUR SUBSCRIPTION HERE

Why I Need to Write This Today - ichi (いち), ni (に), san (さん)

The things you launch will decay. The projects you ship will be replaced. The true measure of a professional life is not the checklist of things you completed, but the memory you leave in the people you inspire.

My journey, from the Australian bush, via a career in entertainment that felt like a lifetime, to a new life in the C-suite of tech and media giants, taught me this unbreakable truth: the most powerful currency isn’t the projects, launches, and big things you build or do, it’s the memory you leave in the people you inspire, whether you lead, manage, or influence.

As entrepreneurs and creatives, we are constantly conversing with collaborators, managers, mentors, teams, and partners, and ultimately, ourselves. You won’t remember every project you completed, but I guarantee,

You’ll remember the manager or mentor who shaped you, the one who cheered you on, and the one who tried to hold you back.

We all have those two archetypes burned into our story, and understanding them is crucial, because you get to choose which legacy you leave behind. Meaning, how YOU show up going forward is paramount.

Are you going to be the Bully or the Sensei? The Underminer or the Champion?

Let’s see.

1. The Champion: Who Lifts You Up

You never forget the manager or mentor who saw your potential before you did. This is the Champion, and they are everything good for “Passion Leadership” (yes this is something i’ve coined).

Passion Leadership is the profound, purposeful drive to lead others, not by control, but by igniting their potential.

The Champion doesn’t see their role as just management; they see it as human development. This person, whether they were your corporate boss, your artist manager, or your first investor, believed in you fiercely, often handing you projects or opportunities that felt just outside your comfort zone. They did this not to test you for failure, but to give you the space to grow into the challenge. They’re the ones who treat their power as a source of light, not a gate to guard.

They are your Sensei Miyagi.

How the Champion Changes Your Trajectory:

• They Cheer You On: They celebrate your wins publicly, but they also celebrate your grit and resilience when things get messy. They become your personal PR firm, whether that means advocating for your promotion or securing that critical festival spot.

• They Champion Your Best Parts: They pinpoint your unique strengths, your natural creativity, your knack for team motivation, your ability to run with heart, and they actively push you toward opportunities that use those exact qualities. They don’t try to fit you into a generic slot; they help you amplify your authentic self.

They help you amplify your authentic self.

• They Build Confidence: They don’t just delegate; they trust YOU. That trust is a profound gift that builds an unshakeable confidence, preparing you to lead your own teams or manage your own career someday.

The Champion isn’t afraid of your rise—they actively engineer it. They know that their success is intrinsically linked to yours.

The Champion knows you are not there to serve them.

They are there to serve you.

This perspective is everything.

2. The Underminer: Who creates the Shadow of Insecurity

Now, let’s talk about the other figure you can never erase: the Underminer.

Look, this manager or mentor isn’t necessarily a bad person; they’re just trapped by their own stuff

Their fear, their envy, their deep-seated insecurity, it’s pervasive to them and they like to spoil your bliss, like a wet rag. It’s that personal ‘stuff’ that becomes the fog clouding their leadership vision. They see talent as a limited commodity, and if you shine too brightly, they worry it means less light for them. They are your Sensei Kreese. (Cobra Kai fans, you’ll know this person).

Do you know anyone that makes you feel depleted, ‘less-than’, or undermines your capabilities? Welcome to the Underminer.

This dynamic isn’t limited to business (manager-direct report relationship). I saw it early in my entertainment career when a manager, caught in their own insecurity, would micromanage my creative output as an artist, crushing my artistic vision, and essentially try to filter my authentic self out of my own music. Their job was to free me to create, but their fear caused them to try to control the art itself. I’ve seen it in my Corporate career, where my boss micromanaged my work output, crushing my inability to lead, and essentially undermined my own intuitions until I felt gaslighted and insecure.

My boss micromanaged my work output, crushing my inability to lead, and essentially undermined my own intuitions until I felt gaslighted and insecure.

So what’s really going on in this situation?

• 🥅 It’s Subtle: Undermining rarely looks like a shouting match. It’s often quiet micromanagement, constantly moving the goalposts, withholding crucial context, or, the most damaging move, taking credit for your success while leaving you to clean up the messes.

• ✋🏼 The Fear of Being Surpassed: The Underminer is terrified you might surpass them. So, they keep you out of high-visibility meetings, they downplay your achievements in front of senior leaders, and they quietly prune any growth opportunities that might make you too independent.

• 🧠 The Cost is High: The impact on you is devastating. You stop focusing on the company’s mission or your artistic growth and start focusing on managing your boss’s feelings, which is a sure path to burnout and professional frustration. Worst still, you could lose your job or opportunity, and it WASN’T EVEN YOUR FAULT.

My Experience: Living in my own Shadow

This Shadow I talk about: the deep anxiety of waiting for the betrayal, was created by the actual battles and a type of Karate tournament in the backstreets. which I faced rising in my career. I don’t talk much about this because in the professional world, it’s almost like you’re not supposed to admit you carry this kind of burden. But I do carry it. I take that intense, inward guarding of my spirit into every new position I start, even when I’m supposed to be the boss. (And let’s be real: all bosses have a boss above them.)

As a female leader in some very high-powered rooms across the Googles, Yahoos, Paramounts, PayPals, Disneys and some literally crazily moving Startups, plus a lifelong career of entertainment managers and producers kicking my creative vision as a young artist, my self-led determination to put my passion, talent and hard-work out there has been a cost on my psyche.

Sometimes I don’t even know how to move to the next opportunity when I’ve had some hard-ass antagonists, like Sensei Kreese, literally squeezing my self-esteem into a dark box.

I was definitely that young starlet in Hollywood with A&R managers and my own personal manager telling me that I won’t make it because I was too whatever. That’s where the armor started to build.

When I transitioned to Technology, I was definitely the only woman in a male oriented C-suite meeting or the one person having done the hard-prep for a Board meeting - only to see the Underminer managers and mentors take the glory.

I recall a pivotal moment at one Startup. I was a VP of Program Management. That feels pretty boss-like, right? I had an absolutely amazing Champion boss (CTO) at the time, who simply trusted my judgment and let me “do me.” That felt Miyagi-like. But when he left (or, eh hem, pushed out), the replacement CTO stepped in and instantly went full patronizing, arrogant, and condescending Kreese like. He was a real ‘pill’. My job hadn’t changed, but the dynamic shifted violently. I am pretty sure my talent and experience threatened him, and his solution was simple: he chose to move me aside. It was a calculated, career-stalling decision rooted entirely in what I believe was his own fear of me being a f’ing rockstar as I already had proven. And unfortunately, the all-male C-Suite just sided with him, and the time came to give me an HR pep talk and send me on my way, so he could just hire another male mignon that he brought on from his past job. The signs of nepatism were clear. My HR rep was too young and unorganized (Start up!) to even see it herself. And I paid the price. So did my shadow-self. She nagged me for years telling me “Gilli, maybe you chose the wrong industry”.

The most jarring undermining came from an unexpected place: a female boss at a large tech company.

She had no idea how to do what I did, and her insecurity about her own lack of domain knowledge caused her to undermine my efforts at every single turn. It was quiet sabotage: withholding context, moving goalposts, and making me feel gaslit and insecure. There was simply no place for me in her world. I felt like a creative entrepreneur trapped in a corporate box, crushed under her fear.

Here’s the raw, powerful truth I learned from all of it: The Underminer’s Shadow isn’t exclusive to one gender. It’s the direct, ugly consequence of personal fear and deep-seated insecurity, regardless of who is wearing the leadership title. And until we acknowledge our own Shadow, the anxiety and the constant sense of danger these people gifted us, we can’t choose a different path for the people we lead. We have to stop letting their painful history define our abundant future.

On the flip side,

I’ve worked with truly great Champions who let me run my organization with heart and trusted my ability to deliver. So much so, I’ve had the opportunity to manage 170 people to their greatness in a role at a large Media company. They understood that their power wasn’t a zero-sum game; it was a boundless resource and we championed, he championed, and I then championed a high-performing team to launch one of the best products I’ve ever been a part of: Paramount+. Thanks Sensei Miyagi :-)

I know my future leadership - hopefully being a Champion - is just beginning. But I still carry the “oh, you’re not good enough” shadow every time I try on a new role and I have to really keep that at bay. I have to continue to think about how I can be a Sensei, guiding others and continuing to be human-centric.

When I remember the impression I can give, that in my control, I can uplift my team and the people around me and that is the legacy I want to leave, and the indelible ink I want to mark.

The Silent Sabotage: Understanding Gaslighting

Those experiences I’ve had, the negative ones, had their fair share of being Gaslit.

It’s not just a feeling; it’s a specific, insidious form of psychological manipulation and emotional abuse that often creates the Underminer’s lasting Shadow on your career.

Gaslighting is when someone, like any other victim, is made to question her perceptions, memory, or sanity. In the workplace, or in a manager-individual dynamic - this is a tactic of bullying used to undermine your credibility, authority, and confidence.

Specific Tactics of Gaslighting Against Women

This behavior is amplified for women leaders due to existing gender biases and power dynamics. There’s a lot of studies to prove it. Gaslighting is especially subtle when aimed at women in leadership because the perpetrator can easily exploit existing gender biases to make their tactics more effective.

The Underminer might:

• Undermine your authority publicly: The gaslighter questions your decisions or performance in front of others. When you challenge them, they dismiss it as “just a joke” or a misunderstanding, making you look humorless or overly sensitive.

• Rewrite history to their advantage: They flatly deny having said or agreed to something, even if you have proof. A gaslighting colleague might say, “I never got that email,” when you know you sent it. This forces you to doubt your reality.

• Trivialize your feelings and concerns: They dismiss your valid concerns as “overreacting” or “being too sensitive.” This weaponizes gender stereotypes to delegitimize your valid emotional responses to a genuinely difficult situation.

• Isolate you from vital information: They exclude you from important meetings or email chains, and then later criticize you for being “out of the loop.” This is designed to set you up for failure and make you feel incompetent.

• Minimize your accomplishments: A gaslighter finds fault with your work no matter how well you perform, using manipulative praise or criticism. This constantly wears down your confidence and makes you question your core competence.

The effects of this psychological abuse are deeply damaging:

• Eroded Self-Confidence: Constant manipulation makes you question your decision-making abilities, even on issues where you have deep expertise.

• Strained Relationships: The gaslighter may spread rumors or turn others against you, leading to isolation and damaging your professional network.

• Internalization and Self-Blame: Over time, you begin to internalize the gaslighter’s narrative, believing you are, in fact, “too sensitive” or “crazy,” causing you to apologize unnecessarily and doubt your own sanity.

Your Choice: Champion or Underminer?

The ultimate lesson is this: You get to choose which ‘Sensei’ you become in your life and your career, whether you are a baddass solo-preneur in creativity or business, or a company leader with a bunch of reports, or somewhere inbetween.

To lead with integrity, you need a proactive plan. Are you a Sensei or are you going to be sucked into the vortex of a bully?

Continue reading and get my blueprint: Mastering the Shadow: 10 Action Steps for Passion Leaders.

BTW, theCrea8ve is just $5 a month to get more, feel more, do more, and focus more. Not just unlock more content and activities, but attend our monthly events and even, one-on-one coaching with me.

Subscribe now

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I want you to imagine, for a moment, a bright, scorching afternoon. The kind where the air feels thick, and every breath is an effort. I was out on the track, doing my usual run, and honestly? It was brutal. My legs were heavy, my lungs burned, and every fiber of my being wanted to just... stop. I was consciously counting the laps, feeling every painful step.

It was hot. I was tired. I know what this feels like because my head, legs and body hurts when I run. Because I’m not an athlete. It was muggy, flies, gnats and lots of people around me.

Then, my phone rang. It was my dad from Australia. And without really thinking, I answered. We started talking about his day, about his new house, and moving. And we talked about how he couldn’t find one of the boxes and we laughed about that. “Oh it’ll turn up soon, Dad” (and it did a day later, but anyway.. back to the topic)

And as we talked, something extraordinary happened.

I kept running.

I wasn’t thinking about my legs anymore. I wasn’t thinking about the heat. I wasn’t even thinking about the laps. I was just running and talking. And before I knew it, my dad said, ‘Well, I should let you go, you must be exhausted from your run.’ And I looked up, genuinely surprised... I had finished. Not just finished, but I’d run 8 laps (my average is 2), and I barely remembered doing it.

I had never been less focused on running, yet I had never run better.

Challenging Conventional Wisdom

This experience sparked a question in my mind, one that goes against almost everything we’re taught about success and achievement: What if, sometimes, to achieve our deepest focus and perform at our peak, we actually need to be… distracted?

We live in a world obsessed with focus. ‘Eliminate distractions!’ ‘Single-task!’ ‘Deep work!’ And for good reason, often. But I believe there’s a powerful, often misunderstood paradox at play. A paradox where a well-placed ‘distraction’ isn’t a detractor, but a catalyst.

Flow States and Cognitive Offloading

So, what happened to me on that track? It wasn’t magic, it was something psychologists call a ‘flow state.’

It’s that feeling of being completely immersed in an activity, where time seems to disappear, and you feel effortless, almost one with what you’re doing.

Normally, when we’re facing a difficult task, like running that felt grueling, our conscious mind kicks in. It’s the voice saying, ‘This is hard. You’re tired. How much longer?’ It’s a vigilant gatekeeper, and sometimes, it can be our own worst enemy.

So, when I started talking to my dad, my brain engaged in a different kind of ‘work.’ The conversation demanded my attention. It was a fascinating, emotionally engaging task. My conscious mind shifted its primary focus from the physical discomfort of running to the mental processing of our chat.

This is what is called ‘Cognitive Offloading’ (or sometimes known as ‘Mental Redirect’). My primary brain resource, the one agonizing over the running, was suddenly redirected to the conversation. And what happened to the running? It moved to a more automatic, subconscious level. My body just… did it. Without the constant mental interference, without the internal resistance. The ‘distraction’ of the conversation provided just enough cognitive load to bypass the mental block.

Think of it like this: If you’re trying to push a heavy box, and you keep thinking about how heavy it is, it feels heavier. But if someone asks you a complex question while you’re pushing, your mind is momentarily diverted, and your body might just push with less perceived effort. The secondary task became my brain’s primary focus, freeing my body to excel at the primary physical task.

Where Else This Applies

This isn’t just about running. This paradox of distraction shows up in so many unexpected areas of our lives.

How many of you have had your best ideas not while staring intensely at a whiteboard, but while in the shower? Or on a long walk? Or listening to music on your commute?

I remember when I was about 13 or 14 years old. I couldn’t do my homework alone, in my room, at my perfectly organized, quiet desk. I needed stimulation. I needed to be in the dining room, my homework sprawled out on the dining table; TV on, radio on, family chatting… With all that stimuli I felt able to accomplish my homework (and might I add, I was pretty much an A student).

When our mind isn’t hyper-focused on trying to solve a problem, when it’s gently ‘distracted’ by a mundane or pleasant secondary activity, our subconscious can make novel connections, leading to breakthroughs. The ‘distraction’ allows for a mental wander, which can be the birthplace of innovation.

Or consider listening to music while studying, like I had to do as a teenager, or a podcast while doing chores. For some, complete silence is key. But for others, a low-level, engaging background ‘distraction’ helps. It’s not necessarily making the primary task more interesting, but it’s occupying the part of your brain that might otherwise wander to anxieties, boredom, or more intrusive distractions. It creates a stable, consistent hum that allows the deeper focus to emerge.

Sometimes, when a task feels overwhelmingly difficult, the very act of intensely focusing on its difficulty becomes a barrier. A small, unrelated ‘distraction’ can be the gentle push we need to just start. It lowers the perceived mental hurdle.

This Isn’t an Excuse for Bad Multitasking

Now, let me be clear. I am not advocating for mindless multitasking. I am not saying you should text and drive, or try to write a novel while having a complex work meeting. That’s a recipe for disaster. Definitely don’t tell your boss I told you to watch Tik Tok at work!

The key is understanding the quality and intensity of the distraction. A truly effective ‘distraction’ in this context is:

1. Engaging enough to capture your active, conscious mind.

2. Separate enough from the primary task that it doesn’t directly interfere with the core mechanics.

3. Low stakes if you briefly dip out of it. My conversation with my dad was engaging, separate from running mechanics, and it didn’t matter if I missed a sentence or two while dodging a puddle.

It’s about finding that sweet spot where the secondary activity frees up your primary focus, rather than fragmenting it. It’s about redirecting your mental gatekeeper, not overwhelming it.

WHERE DO YOU COME IN?

I invite you to rethink Your relationship with Focus

So, what does this mean for you? It means we need to challenge our rigid definitions of ‘focus’ and ‘distraction.’ It means we need to be more mindful, and perhaps even more playful, with how our brains work.

→ Next time you’re stuck, next time a task feels insurmountable, or next time you’re simply trying to perform your best, ask yourself: ‘Is there a strategic, engaging ‘distraction’ that could actually unlock my hidden potential?’

Maybe it’s a specific type of music while you’re tackling a mundane report. Maybe it’s a walk with a friend when you’re creatively blocked. Maybe it’s just a genuine, heartfelt conversation during your next challenging workout.

The Power of the Redirection

Because sometimes, the greatest path to peak performance isn’t through relentless, white-knuckled focus. Sometimes, it’s through the elegant redirection of our minds, allowing our true capabilities to emerge, undistracted by our own internal resistance.

To your next distraction, um, success…

xo,

Gilli

P.S. As for me, I’ll just continue to distract myself till I picture myself doing this:

Want more?

Here’s the thing: mornings are not just about productivity—they’re about power.

Most people stumble into their mornings already behind. They scroll, they answer emails, they get swept into kids, partners, pets, demands, noise. And by 9 AM? They’re drained before the real work even begins.

But the truth is, you can reclaim that time. You can create a space that’s yours—before the chaos, before the demands, before the world gets a piece of you.

I call it your sacred hour. Further down I’ll share my 10-Minute Morning Ritual: Reset Your Mind, Body, and Spirit Before the World Wakes Up

But first…

My Chaos Years (a.k.a. Life With Two Toddlers + a Leadership Job)

I’ll never forget when my twins were two. Can you imagine two little humans crawling and wobbling around, getting into everything, eating Cheerios off the floor like they were gourmet meals? My house looked like a toy tornado had landed. My brain? Even messier.

I was juggling the hormones, the endless “Mum, Mum, Mum,” the work stress, the house stress—you name it. At the same time, I’d just stepped into my first director-level leadership role, which came with its own headaches. (Pro tip: managing complexity is basically the job description.)

This was pre-pandemic, so there was no working in leggings from the kitchen table. The rule was: go into the office. Which meant at least an hour in traffic each way. And the cherry on top? My boss at the time was a high-profile CEO—part tech entrepreneur, part celebrity. Which meant his time was… elusive. If you wanted face time, you often had to wait until late at night, after his “creative bursts.”

It was stressful. I was burning out. I had almost no balance.

And yet, something shifted when I found my morning sacred hour.

Discovering the Sacred Hour

Every morning, before the house erupted—before the twins needed breakfast, before the commute, before my boss’s schedule dictated mine—I carved out 6:30 to 7:30 AM just for me. Sometimes, with my husband’s help, I even got until 8.

And that changed everything.

The first thing I’d do? Lace up my shoes and go for a run. Even in the suburbs, just feeling fresh air on my face, my body moving, my heart beating… it was medicine for my mind.

Then I’d journal. Not typing. Not tapping into a phone app. Real pen on real paper, writing until my hands hurt. Journaling is like free therapy: it clears the cobwebs, sparks new ideas, and makes sense of the madness. It’s not just good for the soul: it’s a strategy for innovation.

That was my time. My hour. My reset button.

And that’s the key: you need personal time. Time to be a human, not just a worker, not just a parent, not just a partner.

Mornings Make the Makers

At other times in my life, I used that same sacred hour to write. (Fun fact: I’ve written three books, and I’m working on my fourth.) And guess what? Almost every single page was written in the early mornings.

Why? Because the mind is sharpest before the world barges in. Studies show that willpower and focus are highest in the first few hours after waking. This is why so many authors and creators swear by the morning hours.

Ernest Hemingway famously said, “There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.” But here’s the kicker: he did that bleeding first thing in the morning, every single day. Maya Angelou rented a hotel room where she wrote from 6:30 AM until early afternoon, long before the world could distract her.

In fact, one study from the University of Toronto found that “morning people” reported feeling happier and healthier overall compared to night owls. And bestselling author Hal Elrod built an entire movement around “The Miracle Morning,” showing how a few intentional practices early in the day can change your life trajectory.

So when I say mornings matter, it’s not just my story—it’s science and history talking too.

The Big Shift

The sacred hour wasn’t about perfection. Some mornings I only managed 15 minutes before a toddler meltdown pulled me away. Other mornings, traffic forced me to cut my run short.

But the ritual itself—the choice to claim time before the world claimed me—that’s what shifted my mindset. That’s what helped me rise in my career, write books, and, honestly, keep my sanity as a working mum with twins.

Here’s the truth: your mornings don’t need to look like anyone else’s. You don’t need to meditate on a mountaintop or run a half marathon before breakfast.

But you do need to ask yourself: am I letting the day run me, or am I choosing how I step into it?

Your 10-Minute Morning Ritual (Subscriber Gift 🎁)

Everyone can find 10 minutes. Yes—even you with the busy schedule, the kids, the meetings, and the coffee pot that always seems to take too long.

I’ve designed a simple ritual that walks you through a full “reset” in just 10 minutes. Do this before the noise of the world gets in, and you’ll feel more focused, grounded, and ready to tackle whatever’s on your plate.

👉 Subscribe below to unlock my free for subscribers ✨“10-Minute Morning Ritual: Reset Your Mind, Body, and Spirit Before the World Wakes Up.” In just ten minutes, you’ll move through calming breathwork, energizing movements, and simple mindset shifts that clear mental fog, spark gratitude, and align you with the creator, leader, or artist you’re becoming. This is your daily reset to step into the day with intention and clarity.

Your sacred hour is waiting. The only question is: will you take it?

xo,

Gilli

✨ To unlock the rest of this post → Subscribe to theCrea8ve 👇

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Welcome back to thecrea8ve.com, passion leaders! In today's dynamic world, the call for genuine leadership resonates louder than ever. Forget the polished facades and carefully crafted personas. What…

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xo,

Gilli

Hey Career Growth Hackers!

Whether you're charting a new course, seeking to elevate your current role, or simply striving for greater fulfillment at work, you're on a journey of growth. It's not just about reaching a destination, but about shaping a career that reflects your values and leaves a lasting impact. We're here to take ownership of that journey, to empower ourselves and others, and to cultivate a workplace experience that allows us to thrive with authenticity and purpose.

And in this pursuit, I've created a powerful formula that consistently delivers results:

Desire + Self-Empowerment + Authenticity = Career Power.

Let's break down each element and see how they work together to unlock your full potential.

1. Desire: The Fuel in Your Tank

Desire is the raw, burning passion that drives you. It's the "why" behind your goals. It's not just wanting a promotion; it's wanting to make a significant impact in your field.

• Dig Deep: Ask yourself: What truly excites you? What problems do you want to solve? What legacy do you want to leave?

• Visualize Your Success: Paint a vivid picture of your ideal career. Feel the emotions associated with achieving your goals.

• Embrace Ambition: Don't be afraid to want more. Big dreams fuel big actions.

Without a strong desire, your career journey will lack direction and momentum. It's the spark that ignites the engine.

2. Self-Empowerment: Taking the Reins

Self-empowerment is about taking ownership of your career. It's recognizing your agency and believing in your ability to shape your future.

• Develop Your Skills: Invest in yourself. Learn new skills, seek out mentors, and constantly expand your knowledge.

• Build Your Confidence: Recognize your strengths and celebrate your achievements. Don't let imposter syndrome hold you back.

• Take Initiative: Don't wait for opportunities to come to you. Create them. Be proactive and take calculated risks.

• Set Boundaries: Learn to say no to things that don't align with your goals. Protect your time and energy.

Self-empowerment is about shifting from being a passive passenger to an active driver in your career. It's about taking control and making things happen.

3. Authenticity: The Core of Your Brand

Authenticity is about being true to yourself. It's about bringing your unique personality, values, and perspectives to your work.

• Know Your Values: Identify what matters most to you and ensure your career aligns with those values.

• Embrace Your Strengths and Weaknesses: Be honest about what you're good at and where you need to improve.

• Communicate Honestly: Share your ideas and opinions openly and respectfully.

• Build Genuine Connections: Focus on building meaningful relationships with colleagues and mentors.

Authenticity builds trust and credibility. It allows you to connect with others on a deeper level and create a powerful personal brand.

Putting It All Together: Career Power

When you combine desire, self-empowerment, and authenticity, you create a powerful force that propels your career forward.

• Desire provides the direction.

• Self-empowerment provides the action.

• Authenticity provides the connection.

This equation isn't a magic formula, but a framework for intentional career growth. It requires consistent effort, self-reflection, and a willingness to step outside your comfort zone.

Call to Action:

• Reflect on each element of the equation. Where are you strong? Where can you improve?

• Identify one actionable step you can take today to strengthen each area.

• Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. Let's learn and grow together!

Remember, your career is a journey of continuous evolution. Embrace the power within you, and watch your career soar.

Stay hungry, stay empowered, and stay authentic!

Until next time,

xo,

Gilli

With permission from my cousins, I have set up a GoFunMe fundraiser to help them for their immediate needs and recent devastating loss: their home is gone.

Feel free to watch the video above too

They are currently staying with a friend and have the bare minimum with them, that they were able to escape with during evacuation. Lucas' school was almost burned, everything he has, except his iPad, is destroyed. All of Mike and Elizabeth's personal belongings, clothes, household items, furniture, some antiques, art, beloved items, all gone in the fire.

They will re-build their lives over time, but right now they have immediate needs to get them back on their feet, that help with real, day-to-day survival.

How to help

This GoFundMe fundraiser is to assist in that effort, and hopes to cover basic essentials. Feel free to donate, or share on please 🙏🏼

Donate or Share

Here’s what sucks.

Elizabeth is SUCH an amazing EntreprenHER. I mean, amazing. She has built her own business (BARU Advertising) for the last 15 yrs, and became a leader in her field. Blood, sweat and tears. Literally. She did this from nothing. And she put everything into this home.

I remember when she and I rented a 2 bedroom apartment in West LA, off the 405, in ‘97. We were young, ambitious and neither of us really knew what we were going to do long term. I was here for the music industry and everything Hollywood was enticing, and she wanted to be an actress! Two young women, ready for anything.

A true EntreprenHER

Instead of waiting for hopes and dreams from the Hollywood machine, Elizabeth took the right call at the right time. She got a job at Focus Media in the marketing insights world, and worked her way up. Then a few hop, skips and jumps and all of a sudden she was out on her own with her own boutique advertising agency. What a risk taker: a true entreprenHER. By 2007, she was running a business, as a woman, where no woman dared to lead, capturing the attention of high flyer advertisers across all media channels, while everyone else was learning to create selfies on Facebook for fun. And she built that business up to where it is today, with many Hollywood and Media clients now calling her for her marketing help, where no actress would ever get those calls. Elizabeth is a self-made success story.

Elizabeth and I were chatting the other night, two days after her home burned down to the ground. It’s hard, because sadness is overwhelming. In between the hugs and tears, she shared something so profound that I felt I needed to share with you. It went something like this,

“Gilli, I worked so hard to get to a place where I could have a home I could just wake up in the morning in, and walk outside with my cup of coffee, and soak in the morning sun, look at the view and enjoy nature and feel like it was my paradise.

I loved that I could work out at home, and be close to my family, and then know I could come home from work to my oasis, my dream place. I loved my home so much. It was my dream and represented everything I worked hard for, and now I’ve lost it.”

This devastation from the fires has plagued Los Angeles this last week. Thousands and thousands of homes have burned to the ground. It’s absolutely awful and we’ve experienced so much loss here, including lives and livestock.

My parting words here people:

Life is fleeting. Success is fleeting. Things are fleeting.

But success remains even surrounded by the ashes you may have lost a house, or a fabulous job, or possessions and awards that represent your past successes, but that doesn’t take away the success itself.

Hug your loved ones, hug your own heart and yes, even your own ego (she needs hugging too), and know that inside YOU are enough, even without everything around you. Even without those awards or clothes or jewels that burned in the fire. Even without a job you may have been let got from. Even without those connections or opportunities that mysteriously may not be showing right now: you ARE still successful.

No one and nothing can take away your sense of self. We go through the ups and the downs, the wins and the losses. At the end of the day YOU ARE AMAZING.

Hope Lives.

Love you all, from LA today,

Gilli